Ah, yes, the why-are-you-pointing-that-camera-at-me grimace… 😆 Could this also be the face of emotional wellness?
✋I feel like I need to make a confession: I’m a life coach, and I’m not always happy.
Let me back up.
I spent 12 years in the software industry (Software Engineer -> Head of Product) before becoming a Martha Beck Certified Life Coach.
Surprising career change, right?
Tbh, throughout most of my software career, I questioned whether I was on the right path. I worried I was wasting my time because it wasn’t deeply meaningful work.
But I didn’t know what to do instead.
And trust me, I searched! As far back as middle school I gobbled up career assessments, eager to find my ideal career. Later in life it was Gallup StrengthsFinder, DiSC, Myers Briggs… and all the books at the library with “Life Purpose” in the title. 📚
At the same time, I’ve long struggled with depression, anxiety, and grief.
When it all became too much, I found an exceptional therapist (my 5th) and spent 5 years digging deep. Then I worked with life coaches, and trained as one.
And here’s the MOST IMPORTANT THING I’ve learned through all of this: It’s not about feeling good. It’s about getting good at feeling.
It’s not about feeling good. It’s about getting good at feeling.Life Coach Mandy Kubicek
So, no, I’m not always happy. I also experience feeling sad, angry, joyful, irritable, grateful, tired, sexy, hungry, silly, arrogant, calm… This is what humans do! My ongoing practice is remembering – especially when feelings I think of as “bad” come on – to be observant, nonjudgmental, and compassionate.
This, my friend, is true emotional wellness.
What are the feelings you have the hardest time accepting in yourself?
Are you willing to offer yourself compassion the next time you experience these emotions?
PS Here’s an article on *how* to feel uncomfortable feelings.